All things Irish

The Cat and the Dog
Long ago the dog used to be out in the wet and the cold, while the cat remained inside near the fire. One day, when he was “drowned wet,” the dog said to the cat, “You have a comfortable place, but you won’t have it any longer. I’m going to find out whether I have to be outside every wet day, while you are inside. The man of the house overheard the argument between the two and thought that it would be right to settle the matter. “Tomorrow,” said he, “I will start a race between ye five miles from the house, and whichever of ye comes into the house first will have the right to stay inside from then on. The other can look after the place outside.” Next day, the two got themselves ready for the race. As they ran toward the house, the dog was a half -mile ahead of the cat. Then he met a beggar man. When the beggar man saw the dog running toward him with his mouth open, he thought he was running to bite him. He had a stick in his hand and he struck the dog as he ran by. The dog was hurt and started to bark at the beggar man and tried to bite him for satisfaction. Meanwhile the cat ran toward the house, and she was licking herself near the fire and resting after the race when the dog arrived. “Now,” said the cat when the dog ran in, “the race is won, and I have the inside of the house for ever more. “-

As the Irishman said to William Wallace in "Braveheart" -- " The Lord said he can get me out of this one, but he's pretty sure you're messed up" and another one " In order to find his equal, an Irishman is forced to talk to God"